


Its A Finicky Muse  With Only Potential

by Uglysweater



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, alcohol use, i guess idk i hate tagging
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-10
Updated: 2015-10-10
Packaged: 2018-04-24 18:48:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4931143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Uglysweater/pseuds/Uglysweater
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ronan opened his mouth. He wasn't sure what he planned on saying. He might have said something biting and cruel, easily identifiable as the reason Adam would leave. He might have said something soft, begging him to stay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Its A Finicky Muse  With Only Potential

**Author's Note:**

> Number 11: Things You Said When You Were Drunk

The front door to Monmouth Manufacturing opened with a bang. A significant feat, considering how heavy it was. The noise would've probably woken Ronan up if he weren't already awake. 

He slowly pulled the headphones off his ears and frowned. Adam and Gansey weren't due back from DC until tomorrow early afternoon. Maybe even later if they weren’t summoned by some fucking brunch thing. Chainsaw squawked from her perch by the window and began tearing pages out of Ronan's physics textbook. Ronan listened closer. Just softer than Chainsaw's rustling of paper he could hear footsteps in the apartment. Two sets. 

Ronan slid off his bed and padded barefoot to his bedroom door. Light was seeping in under the crack by his feet. He pressed his ear against the door. Somewhere on the other side Gansey was giving a rousing speech. Ronan couldn't make out what exactly he was saying but his friend's tone was firm but kind. 

Behind Ronan, Chainsaw knocked the book to the floor with a thud. The voice on the other side of the door abruptly quieted. 

"Gansey?" Ronan asked and pulled the door open. Standing less than a foot from him was not his roommate, but Adam Parrish. His cheeks were flushed red under his freckles. A little farther back stood Gansey. When Ronan saw him, Gansey’s eyes widened and he abruptly turned and tripped into the sofa. Adam laughed, then quickly covered his mouth. 

Ronan looked back and forth between the two of them. Gansey, face deep in the cushions of the sofa, Adam, blushing deliciously red and trying to hide a smile. 

"Are you? Are you two drunk?" He asked. 

"We didn't drive." Adam said with a frown the same moment Gansey said "Only tipsy my good man." 

"Who the hell drove?" Ronan felt his own hypocrisy like a snake bite. He hoped the others didn't notice. 

"We were driven. A driver." Adam said. 

"One can afford such extravagances when one has a fancy internship now." Gansey added. Adam dropped his gaze and his blush took a detour down his neck. He reached out and grabbed the edge of Ronan's t-shirt. He strode into Ronan's bedroom, pulling Ronan along. 

Adam closed the door behind them and the room fell silent. 

"So," Ronan began, "You got an internship." 

"Yeah. Uh, Yeah." Adam shrugged, "With the guy running against Gansey's mom, oddly enough." 

"Oh yeah, odd." The bile in Ronan's stomach churned. 

"I thought it was ginger ale." Adam said suddenly and Ronan couldn't help but to smirk, "You thought the internship was ginger ale?" 

"No. The champagne." Adam said, then turned away, "No I didn't. They're different colored, I can tell the difference. I had the champagne because I have something really important to tell you and I thought it would help." 

"It rarely does." Ronan said as he let Adam's words hit him. I have something important to tell you. 

"You would know." Adam said, and then looked away. Bile churned again inside Ronan's stomach. I have something important to tell you and I thought it would help. 

"Yeah, I would know." Ronan passed Adam to flop down on the edge of his bed. Adam is going to break up with him. 

Adam is going to break up with him. 

He's going to break up with him and it's more than he's even worth. They've what? Kissed a handful of times? Adam's leaving after graduation and not looking back. Ronan was just useless antagonistic dead weight, attached to Adam and bringing him down. Now Adam was here to let him go. I have something really important to tell you and I thought it would help. 

He closed his eyes, "it's okay, I get it." 

Ronan felt calloused fingertips against his cheek and his skin betrayed him by reacting with a shiver. Adam's hands brushed softly over him, ripping Ronan apart cell by cell. Ronan's been called a thief before but that moniker has never felt more true than in this moment. He's stolen too much of Adam already, too much of his time and care, when Adam's always been meant for more. 

"I think I love you," said Adam within the hollow and hallowed space between Ronan's dreams and reality. 

"Shit," Adam began again, "That was for later, that wasn't for tonight." 

Adam carefully ran his long fingers through the short hair at the base of his skull. He covered his palms over Ronan's ears, "Pretend you didn't hear that."

Ronan opened his mouth. He wasn't sure what he planned on saying. He might have said something biting and cruel, easily identifiable as the reason Adam would leave. He might have said something soft, begging him to stay. But Adam covered Ronan’s lips with his own before he could figure it out. 

Adam kissed him. He had kissed Ronan before. His tongue tasted like bubbles and wine, which was new. Something else, behind how Adam held him felt new too. 

"I was supposed to ask you to come first." Adam whispered as he pulled back slowly. 

Ronan smirked, "You've done that before though." 

Adam dropped his gaze to the front of Ronan's pants. Then shook his head, dispelling the hunger in his eyes. "No, come with me. I was going to ask you to come with me to DC. For the summer."

"Come with you?" Ronan's brow furrowed. 

"For the summer. For longer." Adam pulled farther away and stood tall. "I'm prepared for your answer. I- I know you're home is here. The Barns are here. I'm not drunk but the champagne was there and I wanted to feel ready for 'No'."

I have something really important to tell you and I thought it would help. 

Ronan reached out and grasped Adam's hand. He traced the gentle, beautiful ridges of his knuckles. He turned Adam's hand over and kissed the inside of his palm. He heard Adam sigh above him. Ronan's teeth grazed the meat under Adam's thumb. He bit, softly, at the flesh there. 

"Asshole," said Adam. 

"Adam," Ronan said. He was never any good at saying the things he needed. He wasn't very practiced on being honest with what he wanted. He wasn't even sure if he was thinking of himself or of Adam at this point. But in this moment, truth hung in the stillness between their mouths as Adam leaned down towards Ronan. 

Instead of wrapping his hands around Adam's waist and pulling him down onto the bed, like he'd done so many times before. He held onto Adam's hand and rose to kiss him. 

Ronan felt like he could do anything if he was standing to face it. He nestled himself between Adam's steady legs and kissed him. How do you kiss someone you've already seen the end of the world with? How do you kiss someone when the end of forever isn't enough? He didn’t know, but Ronan kissed Adam with the heaviness of a beginning behind him.

**Author's Note:**

> this was very short, I don't love it, and I didn't sleep at all
> 
> cross posted on tumblr


End file.
